i love to be in home alone
when nobody is around
venting is the most comfortable thing to do
nobody is there to interrupt you
just vent the way you'd love to
just a little time for myself
of course we have lots of time
but how many of them we used on our own
very tiny little discrete stuff
and it should be a time like this for everyone
everyone deserves a little wastage like this
and every single second like this is too precious
yet it's a need for human
turn on the radio to the max
lay on sofa
watch the ceiling
watch the floor
watch the lizards
see the clock's hand
see the light bulb
play with fingers
and keep on venting
then keep my brain twisting and turning
think of recently happened things
think of people around me
think of new-met-friends
think of old-havent-meet-recently-and-have-been-missing buddies
think of who who who
think of anything
think of everything
anyone
anything
and everything i have forgotten
and then after im done all those silly things i have just found out something went wrong
and i have just proven that it's true on the spot i might have found that out earlier
or should i say i had found that out quite a long time ago but i just used to ignore it on purposely sigh
and even now for i have found it out im still acting like a fool pretend that nothing had happened pretend that i still dont know about anything pretend everything is still
how could i done that way? every time things like this happened i just cant cope with any of them how stupid is that please forgive me foolish me fooling myself and im trying hard not to intentionally play with them
but im just yea selfish
